SAFEST Chapter 5

Roommates

I’d finally gotten Kasukabe to move in with me. My next course of action was to turn him from a friend to a friend with benefits.

I can’t fail like last time.

The weekend immediately after he decided to move in with me, the three of us began moving his stuff to my place. Kasukabe had a lot of furniture at his house, but the biggest thing he owned was a futon. It took two round trips to move everything by rental car.

After we’d finished, we celebrated with some pizza and soft drinks. Horita insisted that he had wanted to live here, but Kasukabe said that my place wouldn’t suit him. As evening fell, Horita left to go to his part-time job.

“Don’t cause trouble for Machiya,” he said before leaving. “I’ll make sure he doesn’t hook up with any more girls.”

With Horita gone, the air in the room grew tense. I tried to break the silence.

“Here,” I said, handing Kasukabe a set of keys.

“Oh, a spare key? Arigato. What’s this small key?”

“It’s a padlock. I put one inside your room.”

Kasukabe seemed to be surprised by my statement. Maybe it reminded him of his own troubles with his keys. He blinked a few times, averting eye contact.

“Are you allowed to drill holes in the doors?”

“It’s fine. I’m not renting this place. This house was passed down to me by a will after I graduated high school.”

“Wow. As I thought, you’re rich, huh.”

“Haha. I guess so.”

I don’t think he was talking about the hole in the door, but he didn’t say anything else. My plan was to build up Kasukabe’s trust by living together peacefully, then strike when he let his guard down.

I made it a point to go out as much as possible. Kasukabe also had a part-time job, so some mornings we wouldn’t see each other at all. We lived together in harmony. I helped him find an apartment, and we had dinner together every now and again. Kasukabe was getting used to this quiet way of life.

He let his guard down, and we became better friends than before.

It had been three months since Kasukabe had begun living with me, and I figured he might as well move in. Our exams were all finished, and it was already summer vacation. He was feeling guilty about not being able to find a place to stay, and I think he forgave me for that night because of that. To be honest, the reason he couldn’t find a place was all because of me. I had been paying rent to a few apartments with no living in them, so he wouldn’t be able to rent them. It was all money I didn’t need anyone.

In exchange for changing my last name and cutting ties with my family, I had been given a sum of money to use as I wished. After all, I was just “a gay disgrace to our family”.

But sex wasn’t the only reason I was spending all this money. I had come to like living with Kasukabe. His room was neat and comfortable, and the way he said good morning in the morning gave me motivation for the rest of the day. Now, instead of paying rent, he cooks dinner for me when I’m not at my part-time job. Growing up as the oldest of three siblings, he had learned to cook as both his parents worked. His cooking was delicious.

I never thought I would become so happy to live with someone else.

But of course, I still had my desires. I always got turned on by the sight of him coming out of the shower, and many nights I was curious about what he was doing on the other side of our thin wall. If I had a chance, I’d definitely bang him.

A chance came at the start of summer vacation. The three of us were going to drink at my place, but something in his work came up and Hortia wasn’t able to come. We’d already prepared food, so we decided that we would just drink with the two of us. The one who suggested this was Kasukabe. He still hadn’t forgotten about that night’s events, but after three months of uneventful cohabitation, he had no reason to worry.

“You’re a bad drunk, so don’t drink to much, ok?” he said, hinting at the events that occurred that night.

Remember what I said about college students and dirty talk?

“Be honest, what’s so good about sex with a guy? Don’t you wanna have sex with women, like, at all?” Kasukabe asked. He was wearing a comfortable T-shirt and shorts; pretty typical outfit.

“Not really, no. If I had to say what’s so good about guys… well, I’ve never done anything with a woman, so it’s hard to compare.”

“Do you really wanna stay a virgin? I mean, in high school you were pretty popular with the girls.”

I’m not a virgin. I guess you could say I’m a virgin in the sense that I’ve never penetrated a girl, but I had a feeling Kasukabe was talking about something different. He thought I was a bottom, probably because of my non-masculine face. I didn’t deny it on purpose. If I spill everything now, he might start to get more wary again.

“Popular? I didn’t even get that many confessions, though. About ten a year, I think. I had a lot of female friends, though?”

“With those looks, you definitely got more than ten.”

“Really?”

If Horita heard this, he’d definitely come to collect his ikemen tax*.

“Did you get any confessions from guys?”

“A few. But I didn’t want to get into that kind of relationship with my classmates or close friends.”

I silently cursed in my head as soon as I finished that sentence. I had already established that I liked Horita. My story was not holding up well. But Kasukabe didn’t think so. He thought I liked Horita so much that I was willing to break that rule.

“Ahh.” Kasukabe said, scratching his head. “… it’s hard, isn’t it? Giving up on Horita.”

I chose my words carefully.

“Are you going to do something about it?”

“I’ll do what I can.”

“I don’t need you to do anything at all.”

Kasukabe had told his friend (me) to give up on Horita, and his friend was suffering. But he couldn’t do anything about it.

He must be hurting.

Kasukabe was really an empathic guy. A friend. If I was being honest, a really close friend – someone who had found his way into my defenceless heart. Horita regarded him the same way, although it was hard to tell they were such good friends behind the constant bantering and rough talk. He doesn’t sleep with virgins, because Horita said he wants to marry a virgin and wait until marriage. He doesn’t want to take Horita’s potential future partner.

He looked at me with a guilty face.

“Sorry, I said something I shouldn’t have,” I said.

“No, it’s fine.”

“Can you do me a favour?

“What is it?”

“Can you give me a hug? For a minute?”

After making him feel guilty, I ask him a favour. The man who was an expert in dealing with women was getting tricked by an old tactic. He accepted graciously.

Edited by Whistle

machiya is really out here flexing his 10 confessions on us. meanwhile my crush leaves me on seen. in real life.

*ikemen means handsome guy. it’s hard to translate, but basically horita is being a salty beach